Everyday I realize that I am missing another semi-necessary household item.
Because I never keep a list I always forget what I need.
So, I'm starting the list here.
- pans (got plenty of pots and not enough pans)
- iron
- ironing board
- coffee pot (for Mike I dislike coffee)
- hand mixer
- sewing kit
- cupcake pan
- loaf pan
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Weekend Let Downs
Disappointment.
It's a terrible emotion. It probably is somewhere near the lowest rung of the emotional ladder. I felt it an unwanted number of times this weekend. Friday, Saturday and by by midday Sunday I could've squeezed big wet drops out of my eyes. Yet, I held back. Even though I was surrounded by a sea of disappointment at least my feet were on dry land. Why add to the sea with my tears.
Without disappointment would we understand satisfaction? Would we truly grasp the understanding of happiness?
It's a terrible emotion. It probably is somewhere near the lowest rung of the emotional ladder. I felt it an unwanted number of times this weekend. Friday, Saturday and by by midday Sunday I could've squeezed big wet drops out of my eyes. Yet, I held back. Even though I was surrounded by a sea of disappointment at least my feet were on dry land. Why add to the sea with my tears.
Without disappointment would we understand satisfaction? Would we truly grasp the understanding of happiness?
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Family of Strangers
My grandpa [mother's father] is in the hospital.
I went and visited him last night with my mom. I prepared myself for the worst. I knew he was in the ICU and unconscious [I later found out that he was sedated and not comatose, which made me feel better]. As expected he had an overwhelming amount of machines surrounding him and tubes inserted and taped all over his body.
Preparing myself for the visit I was unsure of how I would react. My grandpa is Korean and neither him nor I ever learned enough of each other's language to converse. All I really know of him is that cheesy smile he gets when I say hi and the pat-pat hugs he gives me. Since we weren't close I didn't think I would cry unless he looked to be writhing in pain. When we went in the room he looked peaceful so I thought I avoided the crying bit. Then the nurse came into the office to do a routine check up.
The last thing the nurse did was clean out my grandpa's mouth. My grandpa could feel it and did not like it. He kept making an unpleasant face, the most he could do to show discomfort due to the sedation. Once the nurse was done my mom went over and stood next to him. After looking at him briefly she asked me for a tissue. I gave her one and then she dabbed the tissue in the corners of my grandpa's eyes.
He had tears.
That's when I broke. Even though I've never been close with my grandpa I suddenly felt a connection. I'm sure I would've had the same reaction if it was a complete stranger, but regardless in that moment I felt a bond with my grandpa that I never felt before. I can't explain it and I don't know how long this bond will last, but for one bittersweet bipolar moment I felt that we belonged to the same family.
I went and visited him last night with my mom. I prepared myself for the worst. I knew he was in the ICU and unconscious [I later found out that he was sedated and not comatose, which made me feel better]. As expected he had an overwhelming amount of machines surrounding him and tubes inserted and taped all over his body.
Preparing myself for the visit I was unsure of how I would react. My grandpa is Korean and neither him nor I ever learned enough of each other's language to converse. All I really know of him is that cheesy smile he gets when I say hi and the pat-pat hugs he gives me. Since we weren't close I didn't think I would cry unless he looked to be writhing in pain. When we went in the room he looked peaceful so I thought I avoided the crying bit. Then the nurse came into the office to do a routine check up.
The last thing the nurse did was clean out my grandpa's mouth. My grandpa could feel it and did not like it. He kept making an unpleasant face, the most he could do to show discomfort due to the sedation. Once the nurse was done my mom went over and stood next to him. After looking at him briefly she asked me for a tissue. I gave her one and then she dabbed the tissue in the corners of my grandpa's eyes.
He had tears.
That's when I broke. Even though I've never been close with my grandpa I suddenly felt a connection. I'm sure I would've had the same reaction if it was a complete stranger, but regardless in that moment I felt a bond with my grandpa that I never felt before. I can't explain it and I don't know how long this bond will last, but for one bittersweet bipolar moment I felt that we belonged to the same family.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Brain Block
I admit, I am a bit of a hypochondriac. Many symptoms that make me aware of their presence are given many hours of research on Google & WebMD followed by the conclusion that if the symptom does not go away in 24hrs I will be making an appointment the next day. Only once have I had to follow through with the latter half.
Yes, symptoms worry me. Early detection is the name of my game.
What bothers me is that every symptom that is discovered by mothers leads to "Are you pregnant?"
My brain is tired of going through the checklist to assure myself that I am not. Thus my brain's friends, L-ear and R-ear, have decided to tightly secure all entry ways to brain's residence. The sign on the door reads as follows:
Obama has won.
My thoughts on that are summed up in one verse:
*Please note I am not saying that being pregnant or having a baby would be a nightmare, but as of right now it is not my plan. So please don't cause me to worry excessively for something that I am currently working to prevent. I love babies, and want one. Just not right now.
Yes, symptoms worry me. Early detection is the name of my game.
What bothers me is that every symptom that is discovered by mothers leads to "Are you pregnant?"
My brain is tired of going through the checklist to assure myself that I am not. Thus my brain's friends, L-ear and R-ear, have decided to tightly secure all entry ways to brain's residence. The sign on the door reads as follows:
Appointment required for all auditory insanity.
Brain reserves the right to refuse service to anyone.
That's right. I'm not listening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you want to give someone scary baby nightmares please go elsewhere. Thank you.*
______________________________________
Obama has won.
My thoughts on that are summed up in one verse:
"Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God." Romans 13:1
*Please note I am not saying that being pregnant or having a baby would be a nightmare, but as of right now it is not my plan. So please don't cause me to worry excessively for something that I am currently working to prevent. I love babies, and want one. Just not right now.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Vote for Ice Cream
Out of all the "vote & get free stuff" promotions the following appeals to me most!
Unfortuantely... the only one close enough would cost me gas +$4 because of the toll to cross the bridge... To say the least I'm bummed.
While browsing the Ben & Jerry's Website, I stumbled upon a flavor of ice cream I never knew about:
Unfortuantely... the only one close enough would cost me gas +$4 because of the toll to cross the bridge... To say the least I'm bummed.
While browsing the Ben & Jerry's Website, I stumbled upon a flavor of ice cream I never knew about:
Monday, November 3, 2008
Holiday Fever
For the first time in my 24 years of life, I am looking forward to Christmas.
Growing up holidays were not a big deal in my family. The only thing I celebrated during the holidays were school breaks and bloated tummies.
I remember the first year my parents bought me Christmas presents. I believe it was 4th grade. They didn't ask us to create christmas lists, or buy us secret gifts based on their instinctual knowledge of their children. Instead my parents took us over to the local Bible book store and let us pick out some items that would be dubbed our "christmas gifts". We didn't even have a Christmas tree until I was in the 9th grade and even then it was a fake tree that my sister and I decorated with lacklustre ornaments from the local dollar store.
The only tradition we had was the food that we ate.
Thus I never developed any heartwarming attachments to the holiday known as Christmas to me it was the same as Thanksgiving only it commemorating a different historical event.
When I got married, Mike made it mission critical that he change my lack of enthusiasm for the holiday. And as my opening statement shows, it has worked. It is quite strange for me to feel this excitement, but I can't say that I mind. We started putting away money from every paycheck for Christmas gifts, so it should be a little easier on the pocket this year, which is always nice. I'm excited to start creating traditions now that we will do with our children in the years to come. And hopefully my children will understand the meaning of the holiday as well as enjoy the excitement at this time of the year.
Growing up holidays were not a big deal in my family. The only thing I celebrated during the holidays were school breaks and bloated tummies.
I remember the first year my parents bought me Christmas presents. I believe it was 4th grade. They didn't ask us to create christmas lists, or buy us secret gifts based on their instinctual knowledge of their children. Instead my parents took us over to the local Bible book store and let us pick out some items that would be dubbed our "christmas gifts". We didn't even have a Christmas tree until I was in the 9th grade and even then it was a fake tree that my sister and I decorated with lacklustre ornaments from the local dollar store.
The only tradition we had was the food that we ate.
Thus I never developed any heartwarming attachments to the holiday known as Christmas to me it was the same as Thanksgiving only it commemorating a different historical event.
When I got married, Mike made it mission critical that he change my lack of enthusiasm for the holiday. And as my opening statement shows, it has worked. It is quite strange for me to feel this excitement, but I can't say that I mind. We started putting away money from every paycheck for Christmas gifts, so it should be a little easier on the pocket this year, which is always nice. I'm excited to start creating traditions now that we will do with our children in the years to come. And hopefully my children will understand the meaning of the holiday as well as enjoy the excitement at this time of the year.
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