Confessions of the Diseased

I've been hoarding a secret.

Maybe the secret has been obvious to onlookers, but I haven't told it to a single soul. I haven't even admitted it to myself until -- well just a few minutes ago, which in turn inspired this blog entry.

For the past 365 days or so (the case can be argued that it has been longer than that), I have had an extreme of baby fever. Every where I turn I hear about new babies, bellies inhabited by babies, fabrics shaped to fit baby bodies. I've done everything I know of to cure it. Babysat all sorts of crazy wild kids - and reverse psychology kicked into gear, somehow it made me want a baby even more! I had gave up hope denial was the key for me. I did not let the words "I want a baby" even pass the gate between thought and reality. I told everyone of my baby nightmares and mentioned not one word of my glorious dreams. I fained a complete disinterest in creating a mini-me/Mike and created a list of reasons why pro-creation was not the right move for me at this time.

Mike and I made a pack back in 2008 to stop "not-trying"* on our 3 year anniversary. That date has passed and I'm still fighting the anti-fertilization war. I knew (subconsciously, of course) that I needed a remedy quick otherwise my dear friend Tabitha would have a pregnant bridesmaid in her wedding (the horror!). And I have the perfect prescription to cure my ailment:

Ailment: Baby Fever

Prescription: Rubble aka 8 week old puppy

Instructions: Take daily as follows: Play with puppy as soon as you return from work until he is worn out. Then have puppy sleep in your lap for the duration of his nap. When he wakes up take him outside for a potty break, or allow him to piddle on your carpet and watch curiously as you run around trying to find what you did with that spray bottle of vinegar and water. Before bed, lock him in the master bath (to avoid mysterious wet spots on the carpet in the morning) and fall asleep to the calming whine of the puppy trying to make you feel guilty for wanting a clean carpet. Repeat as necessary.

And I am happy to say I am completely cured! Or I was... until this happened:

Awwww.. adorable toddler/puppy videos are making me sick (with baby fever that is)! On to find my next cure. Hopefully it will be cheaper than a new puppy!

*If you do not know the meaning of "not-trying" ... don't ask.